Empowered Relationships: The Mirror Within
Your Relationship with Yourself is the Key
The way you see, speak to and think about yourself directly shapes your relationships with others. If you struggle with conflict, toxic dynamics, or unfulfilling connections, the first step isn’t blaming others—it’s looking in the mirror.
In this episode of Spiritual Awakening with Shaz, I explore how self-perception dictates external relationships. I share practical tools for breaking negative cycles, strengthening boundaries, and cultivating healthy, loving connections.
The Mirror Effect: Why Your Self-Image Shapes Your Relationships
The energy you carry influences how others treat you. If you:
✔ Speak negatively about yourself
✔ Struggle with low self-worth
✔ Feel unworthy of love or respect
Then, chances are, the world will reflect that energy back to you.
Key Insight: Your external relationships mirror the relationship you have with yourself.
When I was younger, I constantly criticized myself. I told myself I wasn’t good enough, that no one truly cared, and that life was hard. And guess what? My external world reflected that belief—people treated me exactly as I treated myself.
Once I changed my inner dialogue, my relationships transformed. People respected, valued, and uplifted me—because I did the same for myself first.
How to Stop Negative Self-Talk
Your thoughts become your reality. If you allow negative self-talk to dominate your mind, it will manifest in your life.
Here’s how to shift those thoughts:
1️⃣ Catch the Thought – When a negative thought arises, pause and become aware of it.
2️⃣ Challenge It – Ask yourself: Is this really true? Would I say this to a friend?
3️⃣ Replace It – Shift the thought into something empowering. Instead of “I’m not good enough,” say, “I am constantly growing and improving.”
Example:
🚫 “I always mess things up.”
✅ “I am learning from every experience and improving daily.”
Key Insight: The way you talk to yourself sets the tone for how others talk to you.
Understanding Triggers: Why Other People’s Words Hurt
Have you ever been deeply triggered by someone’s comment, even if they didn’t mean to hurt you?
A trigger is an emotional reaction that reveals an unresolved belief within you.
✔ If someone calls you “selfish” and you get defensive, it might be because, deep down, you believe it to be true.
✔ If someone criticizes your choices and you feel attacked, it could be because you lack confidence in them.
However, if you truly don’t believe the criticism, it won’t affect you. When someone insults you with something untrue, your mind immediately dismisses it.
Key Insight: If something triggers you, it’s an invitation to heal and upgrade your beliefs about yourself.
Boundaries: The Secret to Healthy Relationships
Do you find yourself constantly giving, people-pleasing, and overextending yourself to keep others happy?
✔ Saying yes when you want to say no
✔ Ignoring your own needs for the sake of others
✔ Feeling drained and resentful after helping
These are signs of weak boundaries. The solution? Strengthen them.
Step 1: Ask yourself—Do I actually want to do this?
Step 2: If the answer is no, practice saying: “I appreciate the invite, but I’m not available.”
Step 3: Stand firm—without guilt or over-explaining.
Key Insight: A strong boundary isn’t a wall—it’s a filter that lets in what aligns with your highest good.
Breaking the Cycle of Toxic Relationships
Many people stay in toxic dynamics because they fear being alone. They mistake attachment for love and familiarity for security.
However, a relationship should never cost you:
❌ Your self-respect
❌ Your mental well-being
❌ Your ability to be yourself
If you find yourself repeating unhealthy patterns, it’s time to break free. Start by healing your relationship with yourself.
Key Insight: You don’t need to tolerate toxicity just to avoid loneliness. Being alone is better than being in a relationship that diminishes you.
The Power of Self-Love: How to Build an Unbreakable Foundation
To create healthy, thriving relationships, you must cultivate a deep sense of self-love.
Here’s how to start:
Daily Mirror Work: Look in the mirror each morning and say: “I love you. You are enough.”
Affirmations: Repeat statements like “I am worthy of love and respect.”
Journalling: Write down moments where you honoured yourself throughout the day.
Prioritising Self-Care: Treat yourself with the same kindness you give others.
When you fill your own cup, your relationships naturally improve. Others will treat you with the love and respect you show yourself.
Key Insight: The most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself.
Are You Ready to Transform Your Relationships?
If you struggle with self-worth, boundaries, or emotional triggers, you don’t have to navigate it alone.
📞 Book a FREE 30-minute Breakthrough Session and let’s uncover the blocks keeping you stuck in unhealthy patterns.
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